We decided to kick off the month of December with a visit to the jolly man in the red suit. He was at a local store, so we ventured over on a Saturday at noon in hopes that the line would not be too long. As luck would have it, the rush had just passed and there were no other kids waiting when we arrived.
I should probably let you know that Catheryn has requested a doll that poops. Yes, poops. I confess that I have been secretly hoping that she would change her mind and ask for something else, but that has not been the case. She has been saving all her dog walking money in order to buy this particular eating, talking, pooping doll. I told her that if she were planning to ask for it for Christmas, then she better hold off on buying it. She agreed to do so, and is now saving up to buy diapers and food for the doll she is hoping Santa will bring her. Catheryn has been begging for a baby sister for quite some time now, and since she is most definitely not getting one from me, I suppose the doll is the next best thing.
As we are walking in to see Santa, Catheryn confesses that she is a little embarrassed to tell Santa that she would like a pooping doll. I told her to simply ask for a Baby Alive doll, since that is what she is called on the box. Sounds better than “Real Pooping Doll,” I suppose. So, she did just that, and after adding a Care Bear or two, she happily came back to me with her candy cane in hand.
Next up is Nathan. He climbs up onto Santa’s lap and kindly requests a turtle with a light-up shell and a rock tumbler. Santa looks down at him with a slightly confused look on is face.
“A rock what??”
“A rock tumbler,” Nathan says again, a little less confident this time. Santa’s next question nearly made me snort out loud, but I managed to hold myself together.
“Do you even know what that is??” he asked Nathan.
“It polishes rocks,” Nathan informed him.
Santa mumbled something about not even thinking that they made those anymore, and then he called over to his assistant, who was busy changing the batteries in the camera.
“Do you know what a rock tumbler is??”
“A rock what??” She had no idea what it was.
Nathan thanked Santa for his candy cane and then walked back over to me with a look that told me he had absolutely no idea what had just happened. I simply stood there, a motherly smile on my face.
Your turn, William. Perhaps a little nervous due to the previous events, he asked for a remote control helicopter, and then said he couldn’t remember what the other thing was. “A video camera!” Catheryn whispered as loudly as she could.
“Oh right, right,” says William, “and a video camera.”
Santa then wanted to know if the video camera was to go on the helicopter, but William informed him it was to record movies the kids were going to make. He picked up his candy cane and climbed down.
The camera battery issue had still not been resolved, so I took a picture of all three kids myself, thanked Santa, and proceeded to walk past the line that had formed during our rather long and awkward visit.
I realized as we were leaving that Santa is probably used to kids requesting the latest video games or hand-held devises and such. And at that moment I felt some pride in the fact that my kids do not have video games. They play with sticks, perform little skits, sing silly songs about stinky feet, and bicker like there’s no tomorrow. Just as it should be.
Don’t worry, Nathan, I know what a rock tumbler is. And I’ll see what I can do.