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Plain and Simple

Some people are just naturals when it comes to dealing with other people. They always seem to know what to say and how to act. The art of communication comes so easy to them. Like breathing.

The same cannot be said about me.

I was a social basket case growing up. I had very few friends, dreaded having to pick my own partner for a project, got red in the face if I were called on in class. But I always thought it would get easier as I got older. That the ability to communicate with others would simply appear. I pictured myself coming off of the wall, walking up to someone of interest and striking up a conversation. I imagined the day when I would no longer be the quiet one. The boring one.

But that day never came.

And I got tired of waiting. And trying. 

And I realized that I will always be most comfortable in the background. I will most likely never like large groups of people. I will forever get butterflies and sweaty palms when I am contemplating actually saying something to someone. But rather than fight who I naturally am, and get frustrated with myself over and over again for not being able to just break out of my shell, I have finally decided to accept it.

I will always be the awkward one. The one who never knows what to say. The one who will invite a wild moose over for tea, but can’t muster the courage to tell a stranger that I like her handbag. The one who hides behind her children. Or her husband. Or the camera. That’s me.

Plain. Simple. Me. And I’m alright with that.


8 thoughts on “Plain and Simple

  1. Mariah..you are a great Mom, a great wife and a great person! To me you are a great friend as well. Maybe not a friend that I can see with my eyes but a friend on my computer.
    So to me it does not matter one iota if you blush, cry, laugh or yawn whilst you are reading my blog. You can hide yourself away, and that is fine too.
    I have also been through what you feel but that all changed when I lost masses of weight and helped others to do the same. I got my confidence. I may have slipped backwards as far as the weight is concerned but the confidence is still there.
    I say what I want, when I want and to whom I want. I will go up to strangers and start talking as if I had known them for years.

    We all love you just as you are

  2. I understand where you are coming from because I’m like you. I hate being in the limelight, would rather be backstage, out of sight!
    After years agonizing over my ‘condition’, I accept what I am, and that’s fine with me – and my friends accept me for what I am. I always say to myself “take me as I am or don’t bother”! It works for me now!

  3. I think you are funny, intelligent, well spoken and caring. I guess I’m just lucky enough to be able to converse with you on the rare times we are together. Shy or not, you are loved!

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